Trauma-Informed Ministry in Everyday Encounters
By Laura Beth Buchleiter and Sarah Lammert.
It had been a long morning, as Sundays generally are for clergy serving in churches. After greeting hundreds of people, delivering two services, and now standing in the coffee hour strategically near the Welcome table, I was happy to meet the new young couple who had attended for the first time that day. I was a bit unprepared for what came next.
“I’m Tom! I was diagnosed with a brain tumor this week!”
While this news was delivered with a lot of verve, almost as if it was great news, I could sense an edge of panic in Tom’s delivery.
“Why don’t we go sit down in my office and talk for a bit,” I suggested. “Things are winding down here and we can figure out what kind of support you might want.”
Moments like these remind us that trauma doesn’t wait for convenient timing—it shows up at the coffee hour table, in a phone call, and in the pews. Such a moment calls for a deep breath! A trauma-informed response helps create safety and presence, rather than rushing to fix things.
Some questions that can guide a trauma-informed pastoral conversation might include:
What feels most important for you to share right now?
How are you experiencing this news in your body and spirit?
Who in your life knows about this already? Who do you want to tell?
What kinds of support feel most helpful for you at this moment?
Are there things you’d like the congregation—or me as the minister—to hold for you in prayer or in practical ways?
These kinds of questions are open-ended and invite agency and dignity at a time when much feels uncertain.
Other trauma-informed considerations:
Presence matters more than performance. Calm attention is often the best gift.
Honor pacing. People may disclose in bursts, then pull back—let the conversation breathe.
Notice embodiment. Pay attention not just to words but to tone and body language.
Support, don’t solve. Holding space is often more healing than offering answers.
Tend to yourself afterward. Find a way to metabolize the secondary effects of trauma on you as a caregiver. Grounding practices sustain you for the long work of ministry.
Trauma-informed pastoral care isn’t about having the perfect response—it’s about meeting people with gentleness, curiosity, and confidence that healing grows when we are not alone.
Secondary Trauma and Spiritual Care
Later that evening, sitting down with an evening tea, reflecting on the day's work, a pastor often revisits these moments and sometimes the panic that they were able to keep at bay in the moment catches up with them. They breathe slowly – thinking about Tom’s tumor, the sudden death of Susan’s child, the hidden domestic violence that came to light this week – all while still breathing slowly.
This is secondary trauma, the silent but harmful cause of burnout for many clergy and congregational leaders. Here are some suggestions for managing the weight of all the traumatic events we encounter as we seek to love and nurture others:
Maintain a Sabbath (a day other than Sunday!)
Participate in some daily physical activity. (Trauma memories are stored in our bodies! They need to be active, even just a little, to manage those memories.)
Participate in a regular spiritual practice (one that does not need to become a sermon illustration!)
Be active in a peer group where these moments can be processed out loud.
Build a strong relationship with a Spiritual Director and/or Reflective Pastoral Supervisor.
If you’d like to learn more about what trauma is, how to bring a trauma-informed lens into your ministry, and to care for yourself as you engage in this work, join us for two new upcoming opportunities from LeaderWise:
Trauma & Ministry: A Primer
A free online event with Laura Beth Buchleiter & Sarah Lammert
Thursday, September 25, 1 hour
starting at 1 pm ET, noon CT, 11 am MT, 10 am PT
Registration link (free)
Trauma-Informed Ministry Workshop (online)
with Laura Beth Buchleiter & Sarah Lammert
Wednesday, October 1 & Thursday, October 2 (2.5 hours each day)
starting at 2 pm ET, 1 pm CT, noon MT, 11 am PT
Registration link ($159)
Together we can practice ways of accompanying people that honor both their pain and their resilience.
The LeaderWise team grieves with the rest of our Twin Cities community in the wake of the August 27 shootings at Annunciation Catholic Church in Minneapolis. As we collectively wonder “What Now?”, LeaderWise wanted to pass along this resource guide put together by some mental health professionals from the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Science at the University of Minnesota.
