The Legacies We Leave
By Mary Kay DuChene.
Legacy: leg·a·cy: 2. The long-lasting impact of particular events, actions, etc. that took place in the past, or of a person’s life.
These days I’ve been thinking a lot about legacy. In case you missed it, in December I announced my plan to retire at the end of May. My retirement discernment was fraught with the question, “How will I really know when it’s time to go?” After I announced my plan, the questions morphed into, “Oh crap what have I done!?” and “How do I just STOP after over 40 years of building up, doing more, contributing?” Don’t get me wrong, there’s also the blissful anticipation of not setting alarms, taking long hikes and camping adventures, cabin time with my husband and dogs, more time with kids and grandkids, and more sacred time devoted to neglected friendships. It’s all these things—the scary, the good, and the bad—all at once.
Late December came with more news—the death of my 96-year-old father. While sudden (and the thought still takes my breath away), there’s SO much to celebrate about his long life. Less than 8 weeks later, my mother (92) died. Wow. One of the last things my mother said to me was, “Look what your dad and I created—this family!” Oh yes, mom (and dad), you did.
So I’ve been thinking about legacy, as I prepare to retire in (ahem) 66 days. One thing I’m proud of is The Shape of Leadership program. I created it in 2010 after sitting in a coffee shop with Susan Miller, then an assistant to the bishop in the ELCA’s St. Paul Area Synod and now a highly sought spiritual director with LeaderWise. We talked about the leadership challenges we were seeing and what we wanted for leaders of the future. We wanted Shape to help leaders (at the time particularly women-identifying leaders, but soon it was for all genders) see their innate gifts, learn new frameworks for leadership, and have practice ground to try out new ways of leading, so that our leaders would become as strong as the church needed them to be.
Hundreds of ministers have participated in Shape and have gone on to bolder leadership than they otherwise would have (their words, not mine). Participants have shared that they value the relationships built through the program and the common language that resulted through their work together, the vulnerability with which they were encouraged to show up, the realization that they weren’t alone in leadership, and the new understanding of what it means and takes to lead the church.
In my experience, ministers leave the program with more confidence and more readiness to step out of their comfort zone and lead—this was our goal for the program. I may be thinking about my legacy, but I know this was God’s work through my hands and through those who have been beside me all along creating and leading this program.
In the coming weeks, you’ll get to hear more about The Shape of Leadership through a StoryCorps–like conversation with Susan Miller, who challenged me to create this program. Plus you’ll hear from others about what the program has meant to them. Stay tuned for that in future issues.
The definition of legacy begins with the words “long-lasting.” We’ll never know the result of our actions, big or small. And what might seem like a small idea can turn out to have a long-lasting impact far beyond our time and our purview. I did what I felt I needed to do, and I know Shape is now in the hands of others who will carry on this good work into the future, creating legacies of their own.
No matter what transitions are in front of you, big or small, I pray you will see the legacy you’ve created and trust that the ripples of impact will go on and on.
